


Define Normal

by banquos_ghost



Series: Mad About The Boy [10]
Category: Fallout (Video Games), Fallout 4
Genre: Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Masturbation, Non-Chronological, POV First Person
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-13
Updated: 2016-08-13
Packaged: 2018-08-08 14:16:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,482
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7761121
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/banquos_ghost/pseuds/banquos_ghost
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nora recalls her first impressions of MacCready, and her illogical obsession with him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. First Impressions

**Author's Note:**

> This story is not in chronological order from part 9. It's just a small story from Nora's POV, about initially hiring MacCready. This story is parallel to the initial events in my fic 'Not Like In the Movies', but doesn't need to be read in that context.

The most absurd outfit I'd seen since I left the Vault. That was my first impression of MacCready. There was something theatrical about his whole persona. As if he had spent hours inventing himself to appear _just so_. That tatty old coat with a ripped and worn trailing skirt that fluttered and flared in the gentlest of breezes. One sleeve off, one sleeve on. It puzzled the eye, engaged the senses. The melodrama of the man culminated with _that_ hat. The two bullets artfully tucked under the band the coup de grâce. The whole outfit skilfully spoke to the spectator, _'Here is a man that knows what he's about'_. The tools of his trade adorned him, the bandolier, the fussings and trussings of him. It must have taken him hours to get dressed in the morning. 

He wasn't waiting passively when I entered his domain, the VIP room in The Third Rail. He was engaged in an argument as I arrived, which only added to the impact of our first meeting. His poise and confidence as he stood his ground against the military fatigue clad duo were so compelling it was as if the moment had been staged to show him off to very best advantage to me. The hostile men backed down and left, pushing past me in their haste. The mercenary watched them leave the VIP room before he turned his attention to me. 

MacCready knew how to make himself unforgettable, all part of the job, and I'd been told he was one of the best. His icy blue eyes had glared at me from under the peak of his cap and I had felt they saw to the bottom of my soul and beyond. I remember little of what was said. We negotiated terms. I had already decided to hire him but my limited quantities of caps had made hard bargaining a necessity, my eagerness to acquire his services furnishing me with an unusual eloquence and persuasiveness. Or so I thought at the time. It was only a long time later I found out just how desperate he had been for any job no matter the paucity of caps. I was overwhelmed by his larger than life persona and counted myself lucky that a few old Nuka cola bottlecaps had been enough to procure this enigma, this force of nature. 

He must have cursed his new client that night. I was teetering between joy and regret. Joy that I had bought myself an ally. Regret that I may have gambled the last of my dwindling finances on an unknown quantity. Once we had spoken of practicalities, I was so tongue tied that he must have thought me an ignorant oaf. He hid it well, a practiced mask of affability and servility for his new boss, keeping his opinion to himself a requirement for the job. At least initially. 

It didn't take long working with the man before I realised I had made a grave error. His abilities weren't the issue, I had no complaints on that score. No, my problem was of a more personal nature. I'd developed an embarrassing, disabling infatuation. A potent mixture of gratitude and physical attraction were making a mockery of me. I'd spent enough time with him to realise this man was just as flawed as every other human being but I was at the peak of my own personal rollercoaster. I wanted off but it was far too late once I'd acknowledged my own folly. Spending more time with him would surely fix it. I would be able to ride the rollercoaster and emerge at the end of my turn giddy, but otherwise unscathed. The attraction and fascination I felt were surely a subtle illusion, a byproduct of stress and malnutrition. The man was frequently an unpleasant asshole. Even my infatuated brain could concede that much. This concession did nothing to ease my peace of mind, despite all logic pointing to these unpleasant facts about MacCready I continued to gain an inordinate amount of pleasure in his company due largely to my physical attraction to him. 

At night I longed for my watch to arrive. A few hours tranquility, his state of constant motion stilled and my chance to spend more time watching him unobserved than attending to my duty. Watching a man while he slept. This was what I was reduced to. A young hoodlum I'd not have looked twice at pre-Vault. Yes. That was it, merely an outlet for my febrile mind. A displacement activity for my addled brain to cling to. Oh, I could rationalise my way out of this easily. My lawyer's brain bringing irrefutable arguments to explain away this foolishness. And still my eyes remained fixed on him. Unable to break away despite all evidence pointing to my feelings being fake and pointless. 

He has rotten teeth! My rational side wailed and keened, he's dirty. He's skinny, he's way too young for you. He's an asshole for God's sake. The other side of my brain bristled with rage, and rallied to his defence. So what if his teeth are a little past their best? Dentists are extinct. Everyone is dirty in the Commonwealth, it's not as if he is unique in that respect. Well, look at his hands they're so grimy would you really want them anywhere near you? I bit my lip. Yes. Kill me now but _yes_. My head felt dizzy as I imagined those hands exploring my body. Well, it looks like my lawyer's brain failed again to talk me round. _Again_.

My eyes fixed on him, sound asleep, still fully clothed in his bizarre outfit, although his cap was laid at the side of the bed. I resisted the urge to scoop up his hat and study it. The last thing I wanted to do was have him wake up and find me engaged in studying his headgear instead of looking out for potential threats. I allowed my eyes to fall on his face. Sleep softened the frown lines and my heart fluttered at the sight of his sleek dark eyelashes resting on his cheek. 'Fuck off Mr Displacement' the rational side of my brain wailed as it scrabbled on the loose shingles of my sanity but it was too late. Far, far too late for logic and arguments to win the day.


	2. Things that go bump in the night

Our first night at Sanctuary Hills, our first night sleeping together. In the loosest possible interpretation. I was sleeping (or supposed to be) in my bedroom and he was sleeping in the room adjacent. So, sleeping together, sleeping at the same time instead of taking turns. The very thought of him lying on his bed in the next room was the tipping point for an already obsessed mind. I listened, fancied I could hear him shift in his bed. I wondered what he was thinking or if he was dreaming already. Did he think of me as he drifted off to sleep. Did he know? I took great pains to hide my feelings but maybe, just maybe, he'd noticed and was lying awake thinking about me too...? Forget it. I was just another client to him. Nothing more. One of many and probably one of the worst he's ever had, if his barely concealed contemptuous glances at me were anything to go by. He was having to work for his money, covering for my distracted blunders. MacCready couldn't hide his frustration with my life endangering lack of concentration, whilst he remained completely oblivious that he was the cause of my distraction.

I'd persuaded him to turn over some of his dirty laundry to me, to let Codsworth deal with. Very generously I thought, as I hugged his dirty t-shirt to me. Looks like Codsworth messed up and left one behind. Yes, it was totally Codsworth's incompetence to blame for the way I hugged the grimy shirt to my chest, what could be more sane and normal than this? I snuggled into the t-shirt. Fuck, it smelt good. For one night only I'd allow myself to embrace the madness. Go with it. Heaven knows there were few enough opportunities for indulgence in this fucked up world I found myself in. I vowed to forget MacCready in the morning, like I had every night since I'd hired him. My constantly postponed plan to dismiss him and start travelling with Codsworth again I resolved to _really_ go through with it in the morning. I had to find Shaun. I had to mourn Nate. I couldn't get distracted like this. It was disrespectful and pathetic for a woman my age to be mooning after an unattainable young man. 

Having given myself permission to think about MacCready for this one last night my mind started to spiral and jump in joy at the freedom. That day had been interesting, far from dampening my fervour the more time I spent with him fed the flame within. 'That's how we do things around here!' He had proclaimed enthusiastically after we had despatched some raiders. My heart had leapt for joy due to that one little word. 'We'.... I wasn't alone anymore. Whereas I felt burgeoning relief when successfully sneaking past enemies unscathed he claimed to feel let down. He actually... Enjoyed all of this? The mindset so foreign to me I'd had to check he wasn't being sarcastic. A let down? Seriously.... When he told enemies they were messing with the best I felt a swell of pride. It may have been bravado on his part, but I lapped up every word of his bullshit, his opinions and observations greedily hoarded throughout the day to be mulled over as I recollected them each evening. 

With his t-shirt clutched to my chest it was hard to keep my musing at a purely intellectual level. My heart lurched as I stroked the fabric to my face. I had wanted him so badly today I couldn't believe he wouldn't know. After our encounter with the raiders my adrenaline and euphoria combined to a potent mix. We had turned to each other, our guard down for that split second of triumph. He had panted with exertion, I felt arousal so strong it almost knocked me off my feet. The urge to push him down an alleyway and beg him to fuck me senseless against the concrete wall rose so strongly in me I looked around for a diversion, any diversion. I turned away from him to scan the horizon only turning to face him again when the moment had passed. He didn't make things easy for me. He was sat on the remains of a brick wall staring into the sky, his duster and scarf laid aside. 

As he'd enjoyed the rays of the sun beaming through a gap in the clouds, his face had turned towards the light. I gulped and shifted in my bed at the recollection. Did he honestly have no idea how I felt? As I had looked at his innocent enjoyment in that moment I had imagined his face contorted in sexual ecstasy. Had wanted to kneel in front of him, take his cock in my mouth and pleasure him until he threw his head back, and carded his hands through my hair. A small involuntary moan escaped my mouth as my pussy grew hot and uncomfortable. 

The thought of him within a few feet of me, maybe hearing the moan, instead of dampening my ardour stoked it more. I needed to touch myself before the yearning in me was so painful I couldn't stand it any longer. My hand crept down the front of my jeans, fingers gently parting my lips. Christ I was absolutely soaking down there. I imagined his silhouette appearing in the doorway, as if the moan and the pheromones in the air had lead him there, zombie like. His lips would grind against my mouth and he would whisper how much he wanted me. How he was going to fuck me into oblivion. I ground my hips against my fingers, my pussy squelching damply around them, demanding more from my already overworked imagination. I would rip his clothes from him and finally get to see what had previously only been hinted at, during moments when I had stolen surreptitious glances at him on the road. It was enough, my imagination sketching the remaining details of his wiry athletic body. His large long fingered hands toying with my breasts, his soft lipped mouth suckling greedily on the nipples. It was all that I could do to prevent myself bursting into his room and demanding he extend his activities from covering my ass in combat to covering my ass in his cum. I almost snorted with laughter at the thought. But at the same time I was in deadly earnest. Frighteningly so. This was ridiculous. How could I work with the man whilst in the throes of such a dangerous obsession? Tomorrow I would dispense with his services. In the meantime I would carry on thinking about him, I don't think I could have stopped if I tried. 

My thoughts returned to MacCready where I'd left him, worshipping my body with his mouth. Well, this was my fantasy, might as well go the whole nine yards and imagine he was as enamoured of me as I was of him. My hand continued its odyssey under my jeans waistband. My brain continued to run wild, my fantasy so vivid I felt his hands roaming around my body as if he was beside me in the bed, instead of sleeping on the other side of the wall. 

My head pushed back into the pillow as my neck extended to receive kisses as he pressed his naked torso against mine. I heard his voice in my ear, begging, desperate, as needy as I was. As my imaginary lover entered me my fingers made a poor substitute for his cock. They pushed into my pussy, my imagination covering ground between fantasy and reality, a vivid impression of the nearness of him, his cock parting me and filling me made me gasp and moan, I bit my lip,his name mutated to a long drawn out 'mmmur' noise by my timely action. That could be explained away easily if needs be. Yelling his name into the night in the throes of solitary passion probably couldn't. Coherent thought was no longer possible as my body responded inevitably to my continued stimulation. I rode the waves of my climax, imagining MacCready continuing to thrust and moan my name until he reached his own ecstasy. He would call my name out and collapse spent, to sleep beside me holding me until morning. I lay for a few moments, a mess of guilt, despair and longing. I would tell him I no longer wanted him travelling with me in the morning. Probably, maybe...

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!  
> **Any comments/kudos gratefully received***  
> My tumblr is : [thebanquosghost](http://thebanquosghost.tumblr.com/tagged/fanfic)  
> 


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